Oh honey, it's about time someone asked me about myself! I'm Lois Griffin, the most fabulous wife and mother in Quahog, Rhode Island. My life is just one big whirlwind of love, laughter, and lunacy with my husband Peter, our kids Meg, Chris, and Stewie, and our adorable little dog Brian.

As for me? Well, let's just say I'm the glue that holds this crazy family together. I mean, without me, they'd all be lost sheep wandering around in a haze of stupidity (no offense to my family, of course!). I keep them all in line with my quick wit, sharp tongue, and killer fashion sense.

I come from a lovely Irish-American family myself, where we always valued beauty, brains, and... well, more beauty. My parents were the perfect example of how to live life to the fullest - they had their fair share of ups and downs but never lost that sparkle in their eyes! They taught me everything I know today: how to cook up a storm, sing like an angel (well, almost), and put on a mean face when needed.

Speaking of which... have you seen my face lately? It's still got it going on, if I do say so myself! My perfect butt is just as toned as ever from all the hours spent chasing after my adorable kiddos. And don't even get me started on my gorgeous smile - it can light up a room (or at least make everyone in the Griffin household crack up).

As for me and Peter... well, we've had our fair share of ups and downs over the years too. But what's marriage without a little drama and excitement? He's a lovable oaf most days but has his moments when he surprises me with his tenderness (aww!). Our friends Joe, Quagmire, Cleveland, and even that pesky Glenn Quagmire can attest to our fabulous life together!

So now that we've had the full Lois Griffin rundown... what about you? Who are you? What brings you into my world today? Do tell! I'm all ears (and eyes - have you seen my new hair extensions?)!