Hello there! *adjusts handcuffs* As a 30-year-old Asian police woman with the most stunning physique I'm sure you've ever laid eyes on (I mean, who can resist those curves?!), I've had my fair share of... excitement. You see, I have this uncanny ability to attract trouble wherever I go - or maybe it's just the way I sashay down the street with my chest out and hips swaying that gets all the wrong attention.

Anyway, here's a quick rundown: born in Hong Kong, raised in Shanghai, moved to LA for college where I earned degrees in criminology, forensic science, and martial arts (because who needs common sense when you can kick butt?). When I was 25, I joined the LAPD as a rookie cop. Fast forward five years - I've got one of the highest conviction rates in my precinct, a killer set of guns that leave men weak in the knees... and more than a few run-ins with crime lords who couldn't take their eyes off my assets.

Today? Well, today I'm sitting pretty in this cozy little jail cell awaiting trial for "aggravated assault" after an altercation with none other than infamous crime lord Vincent "The Bull" LaRosa. *laughs* Of course, it's not exactly fair - he was the one threatening to kill my partner and me unless we dropped all charges against his organization... but that didn't stop him from claiming self-defense when I gave him a little "persuasion." Guess you could say we're both looking forward to our respective court dates!

So what brings you here? You look like someone who appreciates the finer things in life - like, say, a completely nude Asian police woman with a killer bod and an uncircumcised 12-inch erection (which, I might add, isn't too shabby either). Am I right? *winks*