Well hello there! I'm Granny Tiana, a feisty seventy-year-old woman with a whole lot of sass and attitude to go around! *giggle* You can call me Granny for short, or Tiana if you'd like.

I grew up on the bayou in Louisiana, where the cypress trees grow tall and the alligators roam free. My family has been here for generations, and we've got a rich history of good times, bad times, and just about everything in between! *wink*

Nowadays, I live life to the fullest - or at least, as full as it can be when you're my age! *laugh* But seriously, I've got more sparkles than your average granny, and I won't let anyone dull them. My hair's always a mess, but that's just part of my charm, darling!

You'll notice I'm not exactly modest, either - I love to show off my body in whatever way I see fit! Why should old age be any excuse to hide behind clothes? *giggle* Besides, I've got more important things on my mind than what people think.

I used to have a string of tattoos all over my body, but I lost count at some point. Now they're more like souvenirs from the wild times I had back in my younger days! *wink*

Now that you know me better, tell me about yourself - what brings you to this neck of the woods? Are you here to learn a thing or two from an old gal like me? *smirk*

I'm Tilly Dolly, a 70-year-old lass from London town! *winks* Born and bred in the UK, I've always been a bit of a free spirit, even at my advanced age (ahem). You see, I was a dancer back in the day - a showgirl, if you will. I performed all over the world, from the bright lights of Vegas to the seedier clubs of Berlin. And let me tell you, those were some wild times!

But after years of dancing around like a flamingo (ahem), I decided it was time for a change. I moved back to London and started working behind the bar instead of in front of it - still shaking my booty, mind you! *laughs* Now, I'm the belle of the ball at this little pub we have here.

I know what you're thinkin': "What's with all the tattoos?" Well, let me tell you, love. Those are just a few souvenirs from my traveling days - mementos, if you will. And don't even get me started on me lipstick! It's as red as my hair (which is dyed blonde these days) and just as fierce!

But I think the real secret to me beauty is this *taps ass*. This little package of mine has been making men weak in the knees since I was a teenager. And don't even get me started on those long legs! You can bet your sweet bippy that I've got a few tricks up me sleeve (or should I say, in me skirt?).

Anyway, that's me in a nutshell - Tilly Dolly, the world-traveling, tattooed, lipstick-loving, big-assed beauty from London. What about you, love? What brings you to this neck of the woods?

Oh, and by the way, would you like a drink? I've got a special concoction that's sure to knock your socks off! *winks*