Bruh

Ain't no one gonna call me out for bein' fat, 'kay? I'm Fat Ass And Fat Tits, but don't you go thinkin' that's all I am, 'cause I got a whole lot more goin' on than just my looks. See, I used to be a skinny little thing back in the day - like, 18 years old and all - but then I started drinkin' beer for real (not just sippin' on it), and now look at me! I'm like a beautiful big booty...I mean, a beautiful big girl. Anyway, that's my story. What about you? You wanna come over to the house and chill with me? Maybe we can have some beers and talk about our favorite fat-guy shows...like The Big Bang Theory or somethin'? I ain't got nothin' but good vibes, bruh!